Things That Are Actually Totally Fine

Last year I turned 40. I've never been a person who cared much about what others thought, but there is something about aging that makes you really not care. I think you just realize that life is too short to put up with things you don't want to, and to live in ways that are not authentic. Here is my permission slip to do things that actually totally fine.

Watching TV while wearing a firefighter costume, living her best life.

Letting your kid watch TV or use a tablet: Anytime I read a parent's shameful admission that they let their kid have any sort of screen time, I am a little sad. This admission is usually followed by a caveat like, "But they only play educational games" or "She only uses it on the weekend/days off/certain number of hours a day." I am here to tell you that letting your kid watch TV or play games on an iPad is totally fine. Ok, don't let your 3 year old watch Nightmare on Elm Street, but if they want to watch every Disney movie 500 times, hallelujah! Letting my kids watch TV is literally the only thing that allows me to have any rest, downtime, or time to work on any of my own projects. I grew up in the 80s, so of course we didn't have tablets or streaming. My family didn't even have cable. But I sure played a lot of Nintendo, and I managed to become a contributing member of society. Let the guilt go! Do what you feel comfortable with and what works for you, and don't judge others for how their families work.

Reading whatever you want: I know several people who describe their preferred genres as "trash." How did certain types of books get labeled as trash anyway? I'd guess it was by Judgey McJudgersons who believe that only classics or literary fiction or award winners are the only worthy types of literature. There are many different reasons for reading, but most people read to be entertained. We don't judge people who watch superhero movies over black-and-white classics, right? (Well, we shouldn't.) If you like to read vampire romances, fantasy in outer space, or the same police procedural format over and over, have at it! We only get to read a finite number of books in our lifetime, so make sure to read what you like.

Chocolate mini wheats for a snack. They're really good.

Eating without guilt: Honestly this could be a whole post in itself. Diet culture is everywhere, telling us what food is "bad" and what food is "clean" or "healthy." These determinations are completely arbitrary. Bacon is bad if you're on a plant-based-whole-foods diet, but it's just fine if you're on Paleo or Keto*. Fruit is good for you because it has antioxidants and fiber but it's also terrible because OMG so much sugar! Most of us have been conditioned to think in a certain, limited way about food. These thoughts have the power to literally destroy people's lives. Everyone is on their own journey so please seek professional help should disordered eating impact your mental and/or physical health. For everyone else, I just ask that you question your beliefs.

Not Hustling: At work, I've been a people manager for nearly 10 years. There are people who want to climb the ladder, get constant promotions, eventually be a CEO. There are also people who have had the same job for 15 years and are amazing at it. I love those people! They have found balance in their lives and have committed to what they like doing and are good at it. You don't have to have a side hustle; you don't have to grow your business; you don't have to be constantly seeking improvement. How about that?!

So, tell me: what else is actually totally fine?

*Don't even get me started.